10 PM Stem Cell Replacement Blog: Learning, growing, overcoming the fear and the pain. Life in the slow lane.

Here we are again. Standing safely on the shores of mortality. Listening to the waters of eternity endlessly swirl quietly beneath our feet as it murmurs almost incoherently about the inconsistencies of mortality. This will never cease until, once more, mortality is replaced by the serenity of immortality (which always has existed).

We made our second trip away from the guest house in order to shop for groceries. Five minutes from here we encountered a very interesting ethnic “supermarket” featuring a host of fresh fruit and vegetables from (primarily) Central America. What a neat place!

The neighborhood that it’s in is like a bay at the confluence of several very different rivers each with entirely different characteristics. Part of the area is subject to gentrification and that is represented by a fair share of middle income professionals and medical students. there is an Asian influence as well. I believe that these groups are from SouthEast Asia, maybe places like Laos or Cambodia. There is a substantial black community there as well. But, perhaps predominately, there is a bewilderingly diverse Latino influence probably primarily from the Caribbean. It was a crowded, noisy, fun place to shop. I know I would prefer to shop in a place like that. It was a big store rivaling, in size, some of the supermarket chains. This market is also a chain but of a local variety.

I’ve just begun to deal with my “affairs” again. There is quite a bit for me to deal with. I didn’t realize, even before my admission to the hospital, just how much I had been distracted. I missed a lot of what I should have been taking care of. Fortunately, the people with whom I spoke yesterday have been more than willing to work with me. I don’t know how I could have missed some of this. There are so many “psychological” and “emotional” side effects of illnesses such leukemia.

Every day I’m a little bit stronger than the previous one. Still, it’s a struggle to take care of my minimal needs. I’m amazed by just how much my strength was reduced in the last few days in the hospital as a result of my low activity level. I should have been more diligent but it was very difficult because of the contradictory demands of hospital care. I still can’t figure out how to take Lasiks which leads to almost uncontrollable diarrhea and urination and, at the same time, work out dilgently. Medical staff can’t explain it to me either in any way that I can understand it.

I need to get control of my affairs again. The process has just begun. We’ll see what happens next!

More tomorrow!

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